G.O. For Change

Changing people, places, and things one blog at a time…

Posts Tagged ‘life coaching

I Want to Be: A Make-Up Artist (MUA)

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Carla Scott of Divahology

Carla Scott of Divahology

“Being ready is always better than getting ready”-Carla Scott, Professional Make-Up Artist

In continuing with the “I Want to Be” series, which highlights professions that people may dream of doing, we go from barbershops and hotdogs, to getting your faces “beat”! I had a great interview with Carla Scott, who is a professional make-up artist (MUA), and she shared some really great tips. Apply these tips not to become a MUA, but for your life!

Carla Scott, born and raised in Baltimore, is a self-proclaimed, “salon baby”, growing up around cosmetology. While Carla had worked in hair and make-up for years, Carla took a step of faith, and left working in health care, and decided to actively pursue beauty and fashion. In 2011, she moved from Baltimore to Charlotte, and from an acquaintance, she was introduced to photographers, and that started her career. Although she was self-taught, for over 7 years, she wanted to take it to the next level, as well as be able to teach, Carla became certified in advanced make-up artistry, air brushing, and lash extensions in 2014.

Carla points out that getting certified is great as a business, but do not stop working because you may not have the certification. She states that people should “continue to practice skill, technique, and learn as much as you can.”

If make-up artistry is your DREAM occupation, Carla offers these tips for you:

  1. Identify what you want to do: Carla stated that some people may want to do make-up for themselves, and their friends, which requires no certification, but if you want to take it to the next level, and advance your skill set, look for certification programs, obtain a cosmetology license or an esthetician license, as some organizations may require you have them.
  1. Find a mentor: Carla pointed out that a person who is interested in the business, should identify a person who is actually in the business—they can show you tips/tools of the trade, as well as their story in how they grew in the industry. Carla also states that “it doesn’t have to be someone you know. Social media offers you a chance to follow someone within the industry, learn from them, and you may not actually meet them. “One great point that Carla raised was to purchase any books or other information that the person you are following may offer-“you purchasing the information is not just investing in them, but more so investing in YOU!”

Carla also wanted to relay this as well: “Learning from them should not be mimicking their work, but rather, applying it to your skill set, and make it your own.”

  1. THE.WORK.: Carla points out that you should “perfect your craft, even when you may not feel like it.” She illustrates that you should practice on your friends, family—any face that you can work on. Carla blew UP my phone when she dropped this jewel: “BEING READY IS ALWAYS BETTER THAN GETTING READY.” Carla shared with me of a time where because she was ready, opportunities made themselves available. Imagine when those opportunities presented themselves, and she wasn’t ready? She might have missed out.
  1. It is important to brand/network: Carla added this point-“Being a MUA is great at this time, because the social media networks are free, and it allows you to market/brand yourself, network, and get clients beyond your local region” Carla also dropped this—“YOU ARE YOUR BUSINESS-be a representation of what you want people to know about yourself-if you are a MUA, show MUA. Promote yourself-post your business info, tips, and network locally in the industry, not just MUA. Do not limit yourself.” (Man, are you guys listening?)
  1. Patience and Passion: “Do what you love “, make it your business, to be about your business, “make money and profit” are some things that Carla emphasized. In our conversation, she highlighted something that resonated within my soul:

“Passion and patience go hand in hand; when you are passionate about something, you see it, but it may not come together at the time. Keep with it-you may not have the clients, you may have invested a lot of money, and you haven’t seen it manifest, but trust yourself, have faith, and patience. “

 Carla points to her strong faith that has gotten her through the tough times. “It is very easy to quit-have that passion and patience to get through it.”

As always, thanks for reading.

Carla Scott is a Certified Professional Makeup Artist|Motivator| Beauty Director, and owner of Divahology Glam Artistry. If you want to contact her, you can do so on these avenues:

 Email: divahology@gmail.com   Phone: 443-794-9744 Instagram: divahologygb

Facebook: Carla Scott  Twitter: DivahologyMUA Google+: Carla B. Scott


Dating 301: Categories

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Behold, the final installment of the dating advice I have laid out to you! Hopefully, we have survived the  gambit which was winter, and now spring should be peering around the corner. With the birds chirping, and the flowers in bloom, most people will start dating again. Before you take that leap and jump back in the dating pool, please make sure you are caught up on “Relationship 101” , “Dating 102“, and “The 3 C’s“. Trust me, after reading those, you will ensure you don’t waste your time!


According to weather.com, there are 5 categories of hurricanes, ranging from category 1 (minimal) (74 – 95 mph winds, damage primarily restricted to shrubbery, trees, and unanchored mobile homes; no substantial damage to other structures) to category 5 (CATASTROPHIC!) (winds  greater than 155 mph, complete failure on many roofs of residences and industrial buildings; extensive shattering of glass in windows and doors; complete buildings destroyed; small building overturned or blown away; mobile homes demolished).


Now, I know you are wondering what hurricanes have to do with dating. The reason they are placed in categories,, is to inform you of what you may  experience, and how you should treat them. In dating/relationships, it is also vital to place people in their proper categories,  that way, you can know what to expect, and act accordingly. There have been too many instances where people have NOT properly categorized their relationship with an individual, and disaster has occurred. Imagine if your local weatherperson told you that there was a category 1 hurricane, coming tomorrow, when really, it was a category 5! Imagine the chaos!  So, to help you avoid catastrophes in your life, below is a list of categories for you to review.  I challenge to place the people in your life in the correct categories, or problems may occur!


Acquaintances: here are a group of people who you may know superficially. They may be someone you just met, a colleague at work, or even a social event. Bottom line, YOU DO NOT KNOW this person. You could get to know this person, which could lead to-


Dating: (a form of courtship, consisting of social activities done by two people with the aim of each assessing the other’s suitability as a partner in an intimate relationship, or as a spouse.) In this stage, you may share common interests, be attracted to each other, and are looking to see where going out may lead you. In this stage, you should be going out more, and spending more time with each other. This person may be more than an acquaintance, but at this point they are less than a friend because–


Friends: Friends are defined as “a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection”. “Friends” has been a title tossed around too easily. Not everyone you meet is your friend. Just because you work at the same place, see them at a nightclub, praise the same deity, or even liked a similar post on social media, you are not friends. You may have a lot of “friends” on social media, but in the event of an emergency, could you call on all of them? Carefully choose whom you refer to as friend.

In reference to dating, if you are going out, and engaging in social activities with someone, for all intents and purposes, you are not friends, you are just dating. Hopefully it leads to something more serious, like being–


Exclusive: (defined as:restricted or limited to the person, group, or area concerned”) As a former gamer (I am married, with 2 kids, I couldn’t find the time even if I wanted), there would be one game that is partnered with one console, and only one console- which means, that a game like “God of War” would only be available for PlayStation 3—if you owned an Xbox, or another gaming console, you wouldn’t be able to play the game, outside of purchasing the PlayStation 3. When you are exclusive, there are no other game systems you can be played on. It is just you, and that person. While this is the blossoming stage of a relationship, I would highly suggest that you define what “exclusive” means between the 2 of you, and what that entails.


Relationship: (an emotional or other connection between people) In reference to dating, this is where you want to be. This is the last stage, before the ultimate level (marriage). Sometimes, people may confuse being in a relationship with dating. You may have feelings with someone while you are dating them, but being in a relationship with this person is more than just casually going out, it is a strong connection about that person that can bloom into a long-lasting relationship.

You should have no doubt that you are in a relationship, based upon your discussions. Do NOT assume when it comes to dating and relationships.  You may think that you are on the same page, but you may find, you are not even in the same book, get it?


When you add someone to a category, naturally you associate feelings and actions within that category. It is critical to place them in the correct category based upon their actions and statements. Often, people incorrectly categorize individuals; if a person you meet is just an acquaintance, it would not be fair to you, or that person to put them in any other category. A person’s placement in a category should be based upon their actions, not just statements, or the category in which you WANT them to be.

These categories are here to protect your time, effort, and feelings. They are too valuable to be wasted…right? If you are creating your own list of categories, please share.


As always, thanks for reading.



P.S. There was one category that I left out- the ole’ “Friends with benefits” category. Friends with benefits, or FWB, are commonly associated with people being sexually involved, with no attachments. Look-we are all adults, and if FWB is for you, than what consenting adults do is their business. I would highly suggest that you let your intentions known. It may be for that person, it may not—bottom line, tell them immediately, so they can decide if that is the category they want to be in. There is nothing worse than a person being robbed of making their own decisions.

Relationships 101

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Relationships Title Slide

Happy Spring everyone! Ah, spring- the time of year where the weather gets warmer, the days gets longer, and the flowers are in full bloom! And just like those awesome flowers, dating kicks up as well (technically, dating season officially starts during the late weeks of February).

While dating has changed over the years (typically people are speeding up the “romantic” stage, and lessening the “getting to know each other” stage), the core concept of dating is still the same: finding someone that you share similar interests, and hopefully, have a loving, lasting relationship with.

If you are starting to date, please allow your friendly neighborhood Life Coach to offer you some suggestions, as you wade through the sea of potential suitors:

1.Get YOURSELF Right!: Before venturing out into the dating world, you should do a self-assessment, so you will be the best YOU when meeting someone. Are you just getting out of a relationship, and haven’t had time to process? Do you have anger issues, or other potentially “relationship-killing” issues that need to be resolved? Please resolve them prior to starting any new relationship.

2. Identify what you want: We all have our preferences, and that’s great! Make a clear determination of what you want, which, coincidentally informs you of what you DON’T want. Identify deal breakers (i.e. chronic bad breath), and things that you might be able to work around (i.e. opposing political views). If you want someone who is looking for a long-term relationship, or looking to (or not looking to) have children, or be financially stable, have certain assets, then by all means, jot it down. I would however, point out 1 thing- your preferences may lower your dating candidates, but don’t give up, and don’t settle! He/She is out there!

3. Communicate your expectations: Exactly, what are you looking for? Are you looking for a serious relationship, resulting in marriage, are you just looking for friendship/companionship, or something else? Communication is the key to any successful relationship- whether it is business or personal. Think about any job you have ever had; did they tell you 3 months into the position of their wants, or did they tell you right away what they required? If you are getting to know someone, and they inform you that they aren’t looking for a “serious relationship”, and you want to get married within the next 2 years, wouldn’t it better to release yourself from that commitment early, than waste your time?

4. Don’t ignore the red flags: I love the quote by Maya Angelou- “The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them.”(PLEASE reread that!) If you are out on a date, and your spidey senses are tingling, don’t ignore the red flags! Here are some “red flags” to look out for:

  • Being rude: If someone is rude to others in front of you, and they barely know you, how do you think they will treat you later?
  • People who want a relationship too quickly: Look, I know (yes, you!) are awesome, but if you are on a date, and they are already naming your future kids…run!
  • Liars: If someone is omitting information- children, a spouse, or other information that you inquire about, this should definitely be a red flag. As I tell my friends who are dating, lying to someone robs them of making their own decisions.
  • Drama: If they seem to have constant drama following them, why entertain them? (you can also direct them to #1 of this list)

As you are going on dates, remember: you have the RIGHT to be selfish initially- if someone doesn’t have what you want, MOVE ON! Don’t settle with someone, just because they seem interested, and you haven’t found that special person, or your biological clock is ticking, or you feel that you “should be married by now”. Be patient. Good things come to those who wait…right?

As always, thanks for reading,


p.s. Make sure that YOU can bring good qualities to the table as well! You can’t have a laundry list of things you want in a mate, and YOUR list of attributes is pretty bare. Just an FYI.


New Year REVOLUTION: Making your resolutions STICK!

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Happy New -Year!!! First, let me say THANK YOU! My blog has been viewed over 5,000 times in 2012, and if you have read every one of my articles, or even just one, I thank you for time that you have shared reading my thoughts- at work, at home, even from your cell phone.

The ringing in of the New Year comes with different traditions- eating black-eyed peas, the watching of fireworks across the night sky, as well as the infamous “New Year Resolution”. If you are a fan of social media, you probably still see resolutions are being proclaimed- “NEW YEAR, NEW ME”, and other various statements about changing in the upcoming year flooding your news feed.

Here is an ASTONISHING fact: 50% of resolutions fail within the first week, while 90% fail within the first month. This means that as we are close to the end of the first week in 2013 you, or someone you know is dangerously close to ending their resolution.

One of the definitions of “revolution” that I particularly like is “a radical and pervasive change in society and the social structure, especially one made suddenly and often accompanied by violence.” While I am not telling you to start assaulting fast food employees if they ask you if you would like to supersize your order,   I challenge anyone who is in danger of not returning back to the gym after the 3rd day, or reconsidering ending the non-beneficial relationship that you swore you would do, or ______________________ (insert life-changing resolution here) to make a REVOLUTION so that you can live the life that you envision! This radical change in thoughts, actions, and beliefs can ensure that the goals you set can actually be completed. To help you with this task, here are a few things you can do to keep your resolutions:

  1. ENVISION your goal: See the goal that you want to achieve. Envision how you would feel when you accomplish the goal, what it would look like, and what comments people may say.
  2. BE SPECIFIC:  “I am going to lose weight” is not good enough for a goal. You should have specific goals that you can track. If losing weight is your goal, how many pounds would you like to lose? Is there a deadline? (there should be) This way, your previous statement of “I am going to lose weight” can have more flesh by stating: “I am going to lose 15 pounds by March 21st”. See the difference?
  3. PLAN: Planning is CRITICAL to your success in your goals. If your goal is to return to school, the first question you should ask yourself is “HOW”? Research the steps you need to take, write them down, and then…
  4. EXECUTE: This is where people get somewhat discouraged (don’t be). Once you envision what you want, specifically documented your goal, and have a game plan, now it is time to get it done!
  5. GET SUPPORT: Enlisting friends, joining a support group, or simply asking someone to be your accountability partner increases your willingness to continue in your goal.

As always, thanks for reading.


P.S. While January 1st is a great starting point to start goals, I also believe any day is a great day- October 19th, December 5th, June 3rd,-any day can be the starting day to get started!!

10 Lessons I Learned from Cooking

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When I was a young spry bachelor, one of the things that I wanted to master was the art of cooking. I’ve made a lot of dishes in my youth- from cheesecakes, to shrimp fettuccine, even breakfast sandwiches weren’t exempt from my culinary clutches. Now, as a father and a husband, I make most of the meals for my family, and it really is a joy and a love.

As you read on, I challenge you to take things that you like to do, and look at the lessons you’ve learned. Bon appetite!

1. What’s Your Purpose? There are a lot of reasons for cooking-holiday feasts, impressing a romantic interest, or a quick bite- knowing WHY you are cooking often leads your actions.

2. TEAMWORK Makes the Dream Work!   If you have ever used too much salt, ginger, or curry, the results have probably been DISASTROUS! Cooking is the balance of different items (meats, fruits, veggies, spices etc.), and how they complement each other for a harmonious results. This delicate dance that happens when cooking can be disrupted if there is too much, or too little of an ingredient.

3. Be Prepared! Have you ever been ready to create a meal and found that you were missing one or more ingredients?  Sucks, doesn’t it? One of the most important things a person can be is prepared. Having the necessary tools (in this case ingredients), is almost as important as the next lesson-

4.  Follow Directions… Every recipe has directions- step by step instructions that will assist you  achieve  the desired result. As I am writing this, I am making cornbread, and I just messed up…yup, instead of adding 1/3 cup of milk, I added  1 and 1/3 cup of milk (perhaps I shouldn’t have been so distracted).  As you, (and I) see, it’s very important to not only follow directions, but perhaps go over them again, just to ensure you avoid mistakes.

5.  …But don’t be afraid to Improvise!  This doesn’t mean to add a full extra cup of milk to cornbread (still reeling over that), but be ready to make changes. If you look online, there are millions of recipes, and even more variations of the recipe. For example, when I looked up the popular dish “egg salad” here was the different deviations that popped up:

  •  Adding paprika
  • Using bacon or ham
  • Using sour cream instead of mayo

Ultimately, if you feel that you want to add something, GO FOR IT! There have been millions of chefs, cooks, and culinary experts that have modified a dish to the delight of their customers. Why can’t you?

6.  Take Your Time:  In my youth, many a dishes were ruined due to me not following this advice. As a cook, patience is key! If things are supposed to marinate, let it marinate! The more you let something marinate, the more flavorful it becomes. If the recipe calls for the sauce to simmer, then sit back, and relax. Cranking the heat up and rushing things does work in any situation…..does it?

7.  Try Something New! The food world is not compiled of things that YOU have made- there are a SLEW of wonderful recipes that can ignite your senses. Be daring! Be bold! Grab a cook book, identify something that interest you and GO!

8.  Listen To the Critics: There is nothing wrong with feedback/critic in reference to cooking. I made my AMA-ZING (patent pending) WINGS for my friends while watching the Ravens/Steelers game. I made these wings previously, and they were a hit! I looked forward to making them again, but I used a different sauce. Unfortunately, they weren’t as EARTH SHATTERING as my previous wings, and my friends let me know about it (not disrespectfully, but they detected a difference). While there is nothing wrong about having feedback, if you feel that someone is a “hater”, please click here for immediate assistance.

9.  REPRESENT! I watch a lot of food shows, and one of the things that I really appreciate is how the cooks present their dishes- even if the dish may not have been the best bacon-double-cheeseburger-cupcake sorbet, it at least looked nice. A lot of people use social media to post their created dishes, but while it may have tasted great, they didn’t visually look appealing. Make sure that all the senses are covered.

10. ENJOY! If I have learned anything from cooking, it is to enjoy the fruits of your labor. The look on my wife and son’s face when I make a great meal warms my heart. Sometimes people who make their meals feel tired, and may not eat what they have made. I say, enjoy it! When you have a hand in your success, it just seems a little sweeter.

As always, thanks for reading.


Ps. The cornbread I made didn’t make it. R.I.P. Cornbread (2012-2012)

P.P.S. If you don’t do well the first time, you can always try again!!

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